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Issue #1: "I Suppose Next You'll Say She was Asking For It." 

A couple of weeks ago, while I was in the shower, my girlfriend left for work and committed an unpardonable sin: she left the TV on The Today Show. When I got out of the shower, I could hear Katie Couric blabbing idiotically about Al Roker being a "hoot" and "a big teddy bear". Normally, not a big deal – I can tune Couric out with the best of them. The real danger came when she started talking to someone I found a tad interesting. 

Within seconds, I was sitting on the edge of the bed, not completely dry, watching Katie Couric interviewing the rape counselor who talked to the young woman "allegedly" raped by Kobe Bryant. Katie Couric asked the counselor – I'm paraphrasing because I'm lazy and because I can't afford both TiVo and the monthly fees for both City of Heroes and Star Wars: Galaxies – "Why would she (the rape victim) go to Kobe's room? Didn't she know any better? Didn't she know what would happen to her?" And thus another brick was added to my house of hatred for Katie Couric. 

It bothers me when people feel the need to question and ultimately punish rape victims who dare to speak out against their attackers; in this case, the girl, according to jerks, was lying just to get money from Kobe Bryant. Yeah. Sure. She's in it for the money. Isn't every rape victim? 

Back during the beginning of the O.J. Simpson debacle, I ran around telling anyone who would listen that O.J. killed Nicole and Ron. Those were lonely times. I didn't have a lot of friends, and couldn't resist the appeal of a universal conversation topic. At least half the people I spoke about O.J. said, "C'mon dude/man/Dave, remember: innocent until proven guilty." While the other half said, "Who the hell are you?" and "Get away from me/my family." In 1994, half the people I spoke to said of an obviously guilty murderer that he was innocent until proven guilty, but in 2004 out of all the people I talked to about the Kobe Bryant's accuser, 75% said, "Oh, she's totally lying" and "She's just in it for the money." I'm confused. Don't we owe the possible victim of a crime the same courtesy we owe a possible murderer? 

Fifteen minutes after Katie Couric called the rape victim a dumbass – by now the show had me – The Today Show aired clips of the mountain climber who had to cut his own arm off after being pinned underneath a rock. His amazing self preservation got him labeled a "hero" and "incredibly brave". I waited for Katie Couric: Tireless Journalist to ask the question rattling around in my mind: "What was that guy doing near that rock? Didn't he know any better? Didn't he know what would happen to him?" She didn't, just smiled that vapid grin and adjusted her mini-skirt. 

I'm still trying to wrap my head around it; woman who puts herself in a potentially dangerous situation by accompanying a basketball star to his hotel room and is (maybe) raped equals slut and liar, while mountain climber who puts himself in a potentially dangerous situation by dicking around near huge rocks and gets trapped underneath one equals hero? Something doesn't wash. You know what? Now that I think about it, I think the mountain climber did it for the money. People do crazy things for money: fake car accidents, murder spouses for insurance money... cut off their own arms with dull pocketknives! I'll bet if you saw the sweet numbers from his book advance, you'd run out to your garage and grab a hacksaw. 

I'll bet that surfer who had her arm bitten off by that shark did it for the money too. Find me a witness who will say with 100% certainty that she didn't head into the surf with a hamburger taped to her wrist or SPF 45: Now With Pure Beef Tallow slathered all over her body. Two armed surfer girl equals unremarkable. One armed surfer girl equals media darling. 

Some jerks claim that the girl lied because right after her rape she done gone and had sex with someone else, and why would anyone do that after getting raped? I don't know who would. I've never been raped so I couldn't answer that question. However, if I was a girl and was raped, I'd want to put as many penises between the rapist's and myself, give myself a little psychic distance, "Was I raped? Oh yeah, I guess I was, but that was like a hundred penises ago."

On the subject of "who would do _____ after _____," surfer girl missing an arm is still surfing, and one armed mountain climber is still climbing rocks. I guess they really did lie and sacrifice their limbs for fame.

Let's examine Katie Couric's unfair bitchy question, "Didn't she know what would happen?" There's a disturbing subtext in that statement. She implies that in going to Kobe Bryant's hotel room, the girl should have known rape was imminent. "What do you expect, that's Kobe," Katie seems to say. It's as though Kobe is a raping force of nature. Katie cemented in my mind that Kobe Bryant is a rapist, albeit a blameless one. He is no more to blame for raping that girl then the shark is for biting off surfer girl's arm or the rock for crushing mountain climber. 

With that in mind, here are a few nicknames Kobe may want to try for the upcoming NBA season: Kobe "Earthrape" Bryant, Kobe "Tidal Rape" Bryant, Kobe "The Rapicane" Bryant, Kobe "Class 5 Rape Tornado" Bryant, and Kobe "Rape Your Thirst" Bryant.

Here's the real point, whether you think Kobe raped that girl or not, she never even got a chance to tell her story in court, and that's unfair. Lying or not, we have to give victims the benefit of the doubt – just in case they're telling the truth and not in it for the money. One other thing to consider, maybe Kobe didn't rape the girl, but he certainly had sex with her and he's married – which, while not making him a rapist, certainly makes him a huge jerk.

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David DeMarco is a regular columnist writing from Omaha, Nebraska, which is also home to the Omaha Beef indoor football team.
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